I'm an Irish cripple, a Scottish Jew
I'm the blackmail man
A raspberry ripple, a buckle my shoe
I'm the blackmail man
I'm a dead fish coon, a pikey Greek
I'm the blackmail man
A silvery spoon, a bubble and squeak
I'm the blackmail man

Well, I'm the blackmail man and I know what you do
Every one of you
I'm the blackmail man
You make me sick, make me Tom and Dick
I'll put the black on you
I'm the blackmail man
Blackmail man

I'm a Paki Chink, a half-cocked ponce
I'm the blackmail man
A tiddly-wink, a Charlie Ronce
I'm the blackmail man
I'm a no socks tramp, a cavalier drunk
I'm the blackmail man
A paraffin lamp, an elephant's trunk
I'm the blackmail man

I'm the blackmail man and I think you stink
You pen and ink
Blackmail man
I hate your guts, Newington Butts
I'll put the black on you
I'm the blackmail man

Hampton Wick, Berkshire Hunt
Fraser and Nash pony and trap
Blackmail man
Up your 'arris, in your mince
Hampton's don't leave fingerprints
I'm the blackmail man

Blackmail man and I think you stink
You pen and ink
I'm the blackmail man
I hate your guts, your Newington Butts
I put the black on you
I'm the blackmail man